Stitch me up
by NCSP
Summary: Thor wants to pay his Midgardian friend a visit, how will he react to what he'll find?


"Stark?'

Thor's voice could be heard in the entire Stark Tower, but there was no trace of its owner.

"Stark? Are you here?" Thor called again. He hadn't been seeing his Midgardian friend in weeks now, and knowing his tendency to drink way more than what his tiny body would've allowed him, he had started to worry.

That genuine worry had brought him there that day, and that silence did nothing but increase it.

"Stark? Are you alive?"

He truly feared of stumbling into his unconscious body, but for what he could see the floor was clean from any drunk billionaire.

"Mr. Stark is not here, sir."

Thor almost had an heart attack, then he remembered of that strange voice in the walls of the Tower; he would've never got used to Midgardian technology.

"So would you… ehr… tell me where he is? Please," he added after a moment, unsure whether or not that magic thing in the walls required such politeness. Frigga had raised him as a charming prince, though, so he did what his mother had taught him a few centuries before.

"In his villa in Malibu, sir."

Well, if Stark had managed to travel all that distance it meant he was alright, and at the same time that place could've implied the presence of more alcohol than normal.

"When did he leave?"

"Ten days ago, sir."

It was definitely the case to check. And if Stark was still safe and sound Thor would've had the chance of relaxing a bit on the private beach of the villa; maybe Stark would've introduced him to some of those women who used to sniff around him all the time.

"Thanks, magic thing."

Thor walked on the rooftop and used his usual mean of transport, Mjolnir, to get to the billionaire's villa.

The warm sun kissed his skin as he landed in the backyard of the luxury house, making him instantly remove his cape. Who knew if Stark had Midgardians light clothes in some wardrobe that fitted him.

The god looked around to see if he could understand where his friend was, and upon seeing an open window, the white curtain fluttering in the wind, he headed toward the porch.

Thor didn't call out his friend's name this time, he would've simply surprised him with the gift of his presence.

As he approached to the veranda he noticed that Stark wasn't alone in that house.

There was someone sitting in a comfy white osier armchair, whose black long hair was falling behind the backrest.

'Mmh, maybe she has a friend,' Thor thought, but before asking that he had to find Stark.

"Sorry to bother you, my lady, could you be so kind to tell me where Stark is?"

A pair of very familiar green eyes turned on him.

Thor almost had the second stroke of the day.

"L-Loki?" He asked in disbelief.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I… I…" Thor was at a loss for words. Why was Loki there, in Stark's villa? Had he captured the Midgardian, held him prisoner? Was Stark still alive after falling in Loki's hands? Why wasn't Loki enjoying the show of his pain after capturing him?

A thousand questions flooded Thor's mind, one more alarming than the previous one.

He focused on what his brother was holding in his hands; what kind of strange torture device was that?

"What…"

The stuff Loki was holding in his hands wasn't that frightening actually, he was simply holding a needle between his middle finger an his thumb, while with the other hand he had a piece of fabric linked by a green thread to the needle.

Was Loki sewing?'

Upon further concentration from Thor's part the piece of fabric turned out to be a small shirt, way too small.

Too small even for Stark.

And speaking of clothes, why was Loki wearing a large green shirt? He preferred adherent clothes exalting every line of his body, the suffocating heat of Malibu wasn't enough to justify that change.

"I'll ask again since you seem so proud of reaffirming your status of slowest mind in Asgard: what are you doing here?"

"I… I was looking for Stark? What have you done to him?"

Loki did't have the time to get pissed for that more than justified accusation, because the aforementioned Midgardian popped out of nowhere and rushed at Loki's side, hair still dripping water since he had just darted out of his private bay when ha had seen someone on the porch near his norse god.

He relaxed for a moment when he realised it was another norse god, but when it dawned on him that that was Loki's brother, the god of thunder, he considered the option of running back into the ocean and swim all the way to Europe.

"Oh, Stark. Here you are. Are you alright? What did my brother do to you?"

Under different circumstances, Tony would've discussed it at length, but at the moment his main concern was the high possibility of his head being smashed against the wall.

"I don't even know why you ask him," Loki snorted.

"Why? Because I know you. I know you well, Loki, and when I see you alone with someone my first instinct is to check on them."

Loki simply rolled his eyes and took a sip of his cold lemonade.

"Never been better, thank you," Tony forced out a smile, considering how much time he would've had to jump in his suit and have a chance of survival.

"What's Loki doing here, then?"

"Enjoying the view?" In Tony's mind that was supposed to come out as a joke, but it turned out to be rather a question.

Loki shook his head and finished stitching the rune he had started on the small shirt.

"Loki?"

"Yes, brother?" He didn't even raise his eyes from work.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"I think he's nesting," Tony took two steps back just in case.

"Nesting?"

"You're an idiot, Stark."

"I'm not."

"You may as well tell him, then."

"Tell me what?"

"You really think it's safe for me to tell him?'

"You started it."

"Me?"

" _Nesting_ ," Loki mimicked his tone.

"Tell me what?" Thor insisted.

"As if you embroidering nice little stuff isn't already a clear sign."

"For him it's not."

"No, sure. You'll have to stitch me up when he'll be done with me," Tony retorted sarcastically.

"He's too stupid to put two and two together."

"What are you talking about?" Thor asked.

"See?" Loki returned to his work, beginning another rune.

"Why are the two of you bickering?"

"You tell him, Lokes, I'll start putting some distance between me and your brother. Something like one continent or two. So use long words."

"Go away and he'll be the least of your problems."

"Hey!" Thor clapped his hands to recall their attention, and the noise was loud enough to make them effectively focus on him, "Include me in this conversation."

"Well…." Tony circumnavigated the armchair and bravely hid behind Loki's back.

"For the Norns' sake, Tony, he won't bite your head off," Loki scoffed.

"You're my friend, Stark, why should I hurt you?"

"Please remember that for later," he chuckled nervously.

Thor resorted to his last hope, "Loki? Will you tell me what's going on?"

"No," he smiled wickedly, "I'm having too much fun."

"You want to see me dead, right?" Tony whined from his precarious shelter.

"Yes, that's definitely the reason," he absentmindedly stroked his abdomen.

Thor was more puzzled than ever, still recovering from the surprise of finding his brother there.

"Tony, just tell him and be over with this show."

Why on earth was Loki siding with him?, Thor wondered.

"Again, tell me what?"

"Oh, nothing important," Tony simply shrugged.

" _Nothing important_?" Loki glared at him from behind his shoulder.

"No, no, no, that's absolutely not what I meant," Tony tried to contain the damage; for how much he feared Thor it was nothing in comparison to how much he dreaded Loki's rage.

"Are you quite done with this game?"

"I have four more months, if you want to wait."

Thor stared at him for a few seconds, then he actually put two and two together; Loki's presence there, the relaxed look on his face, the little shirt he was decorating with such dedication, Stark, deadly pale, hiding behind the armchair…

"You're with child!" He exclaimed.

When the blond god made toward him, Tony was about to start running.

"Congratulations!"

Thor's embrace almost broke his bones, cutting out his breath. He had been expecting any reaction from him, beside that particular one.

What Tony didn't know was that Thor was rather eager of having a nephew or a niece with a human form. And the additional bonus point of having Loki distracted was also to be considered: with that child Thor could've stopped trying to prevent his brother from invading some realm of his choosing for at least a couple of years.

When Thor turned around to reserve his brother the same treatment the latter was already wisely out of grasp.

"How are you? Why don't you sit down again? Isn't it too hot here? You should probably get inside. Oh, maybe you're outside because the air here is good for the baby. Yes, you should definitely let him or her have some fresh air. Here, though, sit down," Thor took advantage of the fact that Loki wasn't as swift as usual due to the little creature growing inside him, and manhandled him into the armchair again, "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Stay away from me."

"You're not funny. Do you want some more of that thing you're drinking? Stark, where can I find it? Maybe I should start calling you Tony, you're part of the family now," he laughed, clapping the Midgardian on the shoulder and almost breaking one bone or two, "I'll go get some, I guess it's in the kitchen, I'll ask a servant where the locale is."

When the god of thunder disappeared inside the house in search of said kitchen and of an inexistent servant Tony went around the armchair to crouch in front of Loki, "Has he lost his mind?" He whispered.

"Has he ever had one?"

"Loki, he _hugged_ me."

"Well?"

"I thought he would've killed me!"

"You were wrong. Again."

"Name me one time when I… never mind, that's not the point now. Loki, you're carrying my child and your overprotective and possessive brother hasn't tried to use his hammer on me."

"Aren't you happy you survived ?"

"If you plan on continuing this conversation on this note, no."

Loki didn't answer, he simply grinned and stabbed him with the needle he was still miraculously holding.

"Hey!" Tony laughed, trying to wrestle him from his white perch, but when he managed to reach his wrist and tug Loki in his direction he was magically lifted from the ground.

"Careful with him," Thor deposited him next to the armchair, a look of disapproval in his clear eyes.

"I've done worse with him," slipped from Tony's lips, and he regretted it immediately when he saw the stern glare on the god's face.

Okay, maybe now he really had to start running.


End file.
